I don’t know if I should think about the poor people of Pakistan dying every minute of hunger due to the worst flood in the history of their country; or my own shitty cold, complete with fever and shivers; or my friends who just lost their beloved father yesterday after fighting for such long time.

All I know is that life is full of suffering – big and small – no matter what. And the question floating in my feverish head is why we were born to go through all this pain.

But my inner instinct tells me, there are no whys.

S

You blow and blow
into the wind with high hopes
of evoking lights and rescuing him
from the sufferings
of the sleepless dawns.

I see the mass extinctions
and the blinding night sky.
You, in return, make
my inner cage a better nest
with your random smile
and your jewel-like heart.

I mean infinite to you;
you mean infinite to me;
and you, you are an accident
that is prettier than anything
you’d intended to be.

S

Okay – here’s the thing:

This blog is out of commission due to the exceeding amount of inspiration in the city that was once my home. I’m observing the beauty in my daily life here, on the streets, at exhibitions, in strangers’ conversations, while I record them in my mind or doodle them on pieces of papers to save for posterity (and later posts) – perhaps when I’m back in a week or so.

So stay tuned, beauty lovers!

S

“Inspire me”
were the words
of yesterday,
this moment,
and perhaps of
Wednesday.

Let’s incorporate
themes of horror,
madness, love,
reality and fiction,
historical content,
and the toxic oceans.

Let her inspire him
and him explore
her gaze, her smile;
let them both inhale
each others’ scents,
bodies, and art.

“Inpire me”
are the words
in my current
world.

S

It’s almost three in the morning. After a long drive and almost getting lost, she finally parked her car in an empty, desolate lot – dangerous, true, but she had no other choice. She was too numb to feel the apathy in her whole body, the same body that was comfortably tucked in her favorite pair of Levi’s jeans and an extra-large t-shirt with a faded image of a revolver on front, covering her abused soul. That shirt was a nostalgic reminder of the summer warmth in the city she used to adore – and still did.

The city of London.

While a thousand thoughts of lost memories were racing in her mind, she realized she left her jacket on the bar counter beside the lilies and the empty cognac bottle. She wasn’t really bothered with it as much she was for her pack of Marlboro lights in the back pocket, nor did she mind lighting one stick up to calm the high–strung feeling in her stomach and all the pain inside.

Despite severe fatigue, she couldn’t close her eyes even for a second, so she decided to stay there in stillness and slowly insinuated silence inside, just before the rays of the daylight started to salute the city beneath the spotless sky. The single thing accompanying her for the entire night was Eddie’s voice, echoing in her ears, taking her back to the Jeremy days.

After a big stretch, her gaze turned and pinned to an old building across the street and to the only room with its lights on. She suddenly realized that the room’s light had been on for the entire night but somehow she managed to steal glimpses of it.

To be continued…

S

In this surprising world filled with lovely little creatures which – if you think about them – are quite grand in the stranger’s eyes, I’m daydreaming a vision with the full hope of making it a reality.

The day is off just like myself. And I, in my own silence, am making plans of not having any plans and instead am sipping on tepid coffee in a paper cup, tending to attract the virtual world with:

“Caution: Very Hot”.

S